| This is a discussion on Tamchow - Jokes within the Jokes & Funs forums, part of General Discussion category; i ave no idea... afsu... but it does make sense y wasnt it called teeth brush.. hehehe...... |
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| i ave no idea... afsu... but it does make sense y wasnt it called teeth brush.. hehehe... . EvEr SiNcE yOu WaLkEd In2 mY lIfE, dReAmS eNvY mY rEaLTy.. | |||||||||||||||||||
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| yeah it does.. Learning To Breathe | |||||||||||||||||||
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| 179 One day Jaganbhai meets Kantibhai while shopping at the mall and sees he has a small gift wrapped box. “It’s my wife Rupaben birthday tomorrow.” Kantibhai said. “Last week I asked her what she wanted for her birthday.” “And???” Jaganbhai asked. “Well, she said ‘Oh, I don't know - just give me something with diamonds in it”. “So, what did you get her?” asked Jaganbhai. Kantibhai replies, “I bought her a deck of cards!”  180 A son of 2 fathers .. Dvivedi of 3 fathers .. Trivedi of 4 fathers .. Chaturvedi of 5 fathers .. Pandey of several fathers .. Misra of unknown parentage .. Gupta  181 -Bengali One Bengali is a poet Two Bengalis is a film society Three Bengalis is a political party Four Bengalis is two political parties -Bihari One Bihari is Laloo Prasad Yadav Two Biharis is a booth-capturing squad Three Biharis is a caste killing Four Biharis is the entire literate population of Patna -Punjabi One Punjabi is a 100 kg hulk named Pinky Two Punjabis is a Pinky with his bigger brother Twinky Three Punjabis is an assault on the McAloo Tikkis at the local McDonalds Four Punjabis is a combined IQ equal to one -Mallu One Mallu is a coconut stall Two Mallus is a boat race Three Mallus is a Gulf job racket Four Mallus is an oil slick -UP Bhaiyya One UP bhaiyya is a milkman Two UP bhaiyyas is a halwai shop Three UP bhaiyyas is a fist-fight in the UP assembly Four UP bhaiyyas is a mosque-destruction squad -Gujju One Gujju is a share-broker in a Bombay train Two Gujjus is a rummy game in a Bombay train Three Gujjus is Bombay’s noisiest restaurant Four Gujjus is a stock market scam  . EvEr SiNcE yOu WaLkEd In2 mY lIfE, dReAmS eNvY mY rEaLTy.. | |||||||||||||||||||
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mina (March 25th, 2008) | ||
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| "-Bengali One Bengali is a poet Two Bengalis is a film society Three Bengalis is a political party Four Bengalis is two political parties" this is soooooooooooooooo TRUE....I have seen this here a lot তাই রিমঝীম সে কেঁদে চলে, আপন সুরে আপন তালে সেই বৃষ্টি আজ কাঁদায় আমাকে, জাগিয়ে তুলে সে স্মৃতিটাকে কোনো একদিন তুমি কেঁদেছিলে, এই আমার দুটি হাত ধরে বলেছিলে কভু দূরে না হাড়াতে, অথচ কখন যেন নিজে হারালে আমায় একা ফেলে, তাই কেঁদে চলে বৃষ্টি আপন সুরে, আপন তালে, আপন সুরে... | |||||||||||||||||||||
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| The Following User Says Thank You to mina For This Useful Post: | ||
tamchow (February 28th, 2008) | ||
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| A son of 2 fathers .. Dvivedi of 3 fathers .. Trivedi of 4 fathers .. Chaturvedi of 5 fathers .. Pandey of several fathers .. Misra of unknown parentage .. Gupta hahaha.. seriously?! loll.. Learning To Breathe | |||||||||||||||||||
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| The Following User Says Thank You to afsana911 For This Useful Post: | ||
tamchow (February 28th, 2008) | ||
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| 182 A little girl asked her mother for ten cents to give to an old lady in the park. Her mother was touched by the child's kindness. "There you are, my dear, but, tell me, isn't the lady able to work any more?" "Oh yes," came the reply. "She sells sweets!" 183 One day a little girl came running into her house yelling, "Mommy, I got five dollars!" The mother was curious, so she asked her child where she got the five dollars from.The little girl replied: ''Tommy down the street gave me five dollars for doing cartwheel while he sat in the tree.The mother told her daughter: "Don't you know that Tommy is just trying to see your panties."''OOOOhhhh'' said the little girl.The next day the little girl came running into the house yelling, "Mommy, I got ten dollars. The mother asked, "Where did you get the ten dollars from?"The little girl replied, "Tommy down the street gave me ten dollars for doing a cartwheel while he sat up in the tree and laughed."The mother replied: "Didn't I tell you that he is...''Before the mother could finish, the little girl said, ''Wait Mommy! I tricked him, I didn't wear any panties today.'' 184 A certain little girl, when asked her name, would reply, "I'm Mr. Hudson's daughter." Her mother told her this was wrong, she must just say, "I'm Jane Hudson." The minister spoke to her in Sunday school and said, "Aren't you Mr. Hudson's daughter?" She replied, "Well, I thought I was, but mother says I'm not." 185 The child was a typical four-year-old girl -- cute, inquisitive, bright as a new penny. When she expressed difficulty in grasping the concept of marriage, her father decided to pull out his wedding photo album, thinking visual images would help. One page after another, he pointed out the bride arriving at the church, the entrance, the wedding ceremony, the recessional etc."Now do you understand?" he asked."I think so," she said, "...is that when mommy came to work for us?" . EvEr SiNcE yOu WaLkEd In2 mY lIfE, dReAmS eNvY mY rEaLTy.. | |||||||||||||||||||
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mina (March 3rd, 2008) | ||
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| 186 Once X asked Y, "What is the secret behind your happy married life?" Y said, "You should share responsibilities with due love and respect to each other. Then absolutely there will be no problems." X asked, "Can you explain?" Y said, "In my house, I take decisions on bigger issues where as my wife decides on smaller issues. We do not interfere in each other's decisions." Still not convinced, X asked Y "Give me some examples" Y said," Smaller issues like which car we should buy, how much amount to save, when to visit home town, which Sofa, air conditioner, refrigerator to buy, monthly expenses, whether to keep a maid or not etc are decided by my wife. I just agree to it" X asked, "Then what is your role?" Y said," My decisions are only for very big issues. Like whether America should attack Iran , whether Britain should lift sanction over Zimbabwe , whether to widen African economy, whether Sachin Tendulkar should retire etc etc. Do you know one thing, my wife NEVER objects to any of these" 187 santa n banta singh Santa was busy in removing a wheel from auto, Banta asks: Y r u removing a wheel from ur auto? Santa: Can't u read 'Parking for two wheelers only' Santa: Doctor, ye phulon ki mala kis ke liye? Doctor: Ye mera pehla operation hai, success hua to mere liye, nahi to tumhare liye. Santa: Doc saab, mein Chashma laga ke pad to sakoonga? Doc: Haan, bilkul. Santa: To phir theek hai doc saab varna Anpad aadmi ki zindagi bhi koi zindagi hai. Santa: Raat film main ek chudail kabhi mere aage, khabhi mere peechhe ghoom rahi thi... Jeeto: Koun si film thi ? Santa: Apni shaadi ki movie thi ! Santa joined NASA. After one month the Americans had to change the name from NASA to SATYANASA Santa apni girl friend ko I Luv U kehta hai aur gir jata hai. Gal: Yeh kya kar rahe ho? Santa: I'm falling in love. Banta: Yeh chaaku kyon ubaal rahe ho? Santa: Suicide karne ke liye Banta: To phir ubalne kui kya zaroorat hai? Santa: Kahin infection na ho jaaye Santa: Today is Sunday & I wanna njoy, so I bought 3 movie tickets Jeeto: Why 3? Santa: For you and your parents Museum Administrator: That's a 500-year-old statue u've broken. Banta: Thanks God! I thought it was a new one. Lady Doc: Tum roz subah clinic ke bahar khade ho kar auraton ko kyon ghoorte ho? Santa: Ji aap hi ne bahar likha hai: Auraton ko dekhne ka samay 9am-11am A man to Santa: Aao ji chess khelein Santa: Tu chal mein sports shoes pehen kar aaya. At the scene of an accident a man was crying: O God! I have lost my hand, oh! Santa: Control yourself. Don't cry. See that man. He has lost his head. Is he crying? In an interview, Interviewer: How does an electric motor run? Santa: Dhhuuuurrrrrrrrrr. ..... Inteviewer shouts: Stop it. Santa: Dhhuurrrr dhup dhup dhup... Santa was getting bitten by mosquitoes the whole night. He got irritated... drank poison & said, Ab kaato saalon, sab maroge! Captain of Military: Naujawanon aage bado Santa aage nahin bada Captain: Tum aage kyun nahin bade? Santa: Apne kaha 9 jawanon aage bado, mein 10ve number pe tha Banta: Yaar teri wife ki maut ka bara afsos hua, vaise hua kya tha? Santa: Goli lagi thi mathe main. Banta: Waheguru ji ka shukar kar ke aankh bach gayi. Santa apni khoobsurat Bibi k saath car mein baitha. Driver ne sheesha set kiya. Santa gusse mein bola, meri bibi ko dekhkta hai, piche baith, car mein chalaoonga! Santa: tainu Sunny Deol da phone no pata hai...? Banta: Nahin, kyon ki hoya? Santa: Yaaar asi Nalka patauna si. Banta: U cheated me. Shopkeeper: No, I sold a good radio to u. Banta: Radio label shows Made in Japan but radio says This is all India Radio! Sadhu: Bachcha teri biwi ko chuddail chipak gayee hai. Upaaye karvaao. Banta: Upayaye? Baba, agar do behenein gale mil rahi hain to is mein harz hi kya hai ? Tourist: Whose skeleton is that? Santa: Tipu's skeleton. Tourist: Whose that smaller skeleton next to it? Santa: That was Tipu's skeleton when he was child Napoleon: There is no such word as 'Impossible' in my dictionary. Santa: To dictionary dekh kar kharidni thi ...! Santa: Agar tumhe kuch ho gaya to mein Pagal ho jaaunga. Jeeto: Doosri shaadi to nahin karogey? Santa: Pagal ka kya hai, kuch bhi kar sakta hai Banta: Yeh AUTOMATICALLY kya hota hai? Santa: Oye tujhe yeh bhi nahin pata, Jab auto mein koi ganji ladki ja rahi ho to use kehte hain AUTO-ME-TAKLI Santa was riding on a horse. He jumped the red light & a cop whistles. Santa lifts the tail of horse & says: 'Le Karle Number Note' Banta: Oye, tu to Doctor ke paas jaane waala tha, kya hua? Santa: Yaar kal jaaonga, aaj thodi tabiyat kharab hai. Santa: Itne kam marks? Do thappad marne chahiye. Pappu: Haan papa, chalo maine us saale master ka ghar bhi dekh rakha hai. Santa dials a number. A girl receives the call. Santa: Who r u? Girl: Seeta here. Santa: Maine to Chandigarh phone kiya tha, yeh to Ayodhya mil gaya Santa went to battery shop n asked to change battery. The shopkeeper asked: Exide laga du? Santa: Dusri side tera baap lagayega kya? Q: Why did Santa take his pregnant wife Jeeto to Pizza Hut? A: Because they advertised: 'Free Delivery' . EvEr SiNcE yOu WaLkEd In2 mY lIfE, dReAmS eNvY mY rEaLTy.. | |||||||||||||||||||
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| The Following User Says Thank You to tamchow For This Useful Post: | ||
mina (March 25th, 2008) | ||
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| hahahah.. x and y.. Learning To Breathe | |||||||||||||||||||
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| The Following User Says Thank You to afsana911 For This Useful Post: | ||
tamchow (March 23rd, 2008) | ||
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| prova - tumar jonno kotot saradrji jokes post korlam tumi prola na....hmph..... khali afsu amar jokes pore r keo na.. sniff snifff 188 Friendship between Women: A woman didn't come home one night. The next morning she told her husband that she had slept over at a friend's house. The man called his wife's 10 best friends. None of them knew anything about it. Friendship between Men: A man didn't come home one night. The next morning he told his wife that he had slept over at a friend's house. The woman called her husband's 10 best friends, eight of which confirmed that he had slept over, and two said that he was still there. xxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxx xxxxxxxxxxxxxxx 189 Trying to find just the right name for your child? Why not pick one of these? Just find your profession below and we have the right name for you! Lawyer's daughter: Sue Thief's son: Rob Lawyer's son: Will Doctor's son: Bill Hair stylist's son: Bob Homeopathic doctor's son: Herb Justice of the peace's daughter: Mary Sound stage technician's son: Mike Gambler's daughter: Bette Iron worker's son: Rusty TV star's daughter: Emmy Movie star's son: Oscar . EvEr SiNcE yOu WaLkEd In2 mY lIfE, dReAmS eNvY mY rEaLTy.. | |||||||||||||||||||
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