Thanks Everyone..I will make sure I give you lughter therapy..LOL




#6 Cinderella is now 95 years old.

After a fulfilling life with the now dead prince, she happily sits upon her rocking chair, watching the world go by from her front porch, with a cat named Bob for companionship.

One sunny afternoon out of nowhere, appeared the fairy godmother.


Cinderella said, "Fairy Godmother, what are you doing here after all these years?"

The fairy godmother replied, "Cinderella, you have lived an exemplary life since I last saw you. Is there anything for which your heart still yearns?"

Cinderella was taken aback, overjoyed, and after some thoughtful consideration, she uttered her first wish:

"The prince was wonderful, but not much of an investor. I'm living hand to mouth on my disability checks, and I wish I were wealthy beyond comprehension.

Instantly her rocking chair turned into solid gold.

Cinderella said, "Ooh, thank you, Fairy Godmother!"

The fairy godmother replied, "It is the least that I can do.What do you want for your second wish?"

Cinderella looked down at her frail body, and said, "I wish I were young and full of the beauty and youth I once had."


At once, her wish became reality, and her beautiful young visage returned.Cinderella felt stirrings inside of her that had been dormant for years.

And then the fairy godmother spoke once more: "You have one more wish; what shall it be?"


Cinderella looks over to the frightened cat in the corner and says, "I wish for you to transform Bob, my old cat, into a kind and handsome young man."

Magically, Bob suddenly underwent so fundamental a change in his biological make-up that, when he stood before her, he was a man so beautiful the likes of him neither she nor the world had ever seen.

The fairy godmother said, "Congratulations, Cinderella, enjoy your new life."

With a blazing shock of bright blue electricity, the fairy godmother was gone as suddenly as she appeared.

For a few eerie moments, Bob and Cinderella looked into each other's eyes.
Cinderella sat, breathless, gazing at the most beautiful, stunningly perfect man she had ever seen.

Then Bob walked over to Cinderella, who sat transfixed in her rocking chair, & held her close in his young muscular arms.
He leaned in close, blowing her golden hair with his warm breath as he whispered...

"Bet you're sorry you neutered me."


]#7 An actual ad in the London Times.

WANTED

A tall well-built woman with good
reputation, who can cook frogs
legs, who appreciates a good fuc-
schia garden, classic music and tal-
king without getting too serious.

But please only read lines 1,3 and 5. LOL





]#8 A father passing by his teenage daughter's bedroom was astonished to see the bed was nicely made and everything was neat and tidy.


Then he saw an envelope propped up prominently on the centre of the pillow. It was addressed "Dad". With the worst premonition, he opened the envelope and read the letter with trembling hands:-


Dear Dad,

It is with great regret and sorrow that I'm writing you, but I'm leaving home. I had to elope with my new boyfriend Randy because I wanted to avoid a scene with Mom and you.


I've been finding real passion with Randy and he is so nice to me. I know when you meet him you'll like him too - even with all his piercing, tattoos, and motorcycle clothes. But it's not only the passion Dad, I'm pregnant and Randy said that he wants me to have the kid and that we can be very happy together.


Even though Randy is much older than me (anyway, 42 isn't so old these days is it? ), and has no money, really these things shouldn't stand in the way of our relationship, don't you agree?


Randy has a great CD collection; he already owns a trailer in the woods and has a stack of firewood for the whole winter. It's true he has other girlfriends as well but I know he'll be faithful to me in his own way. He wants to have many more children with me and that's now one of my dreams too.


Randy taught me that marijuana doesn't really hurt anyone and he'll be growing it for us and we'll trade it with our friends for all the cocaine and ecstasy we want. In the meantime, we'll pray that science will find a cure for AIDS so Randy can get better; he sure deserves it!!


Don't worry Dad, I'm 15 years old now and I know how to take care of myself. Someday I'm sure we'll be back to visit so you can get to know your grandchildren.


Your loving daughter,
Rosie.



At the bottom of the page were the letters " PTO".

Hands still trembling, her father turned the sheet, and read:


PS:

Dad, none of the above is true. I'm over at the neighbour's house. I just wanted to remind you that there are worse things in life than my report card that's in my desk centre drawer. Please sign it and call when it is safe for me to come home.


I love you!

Your loving daughter,
Rosie


************ *





]#9 Web Sites that Sound Dirty (But Aren't)

Category: Online life[/url] , True Story[/url]

You have to be careful when you register a domain name! It's sometimes hard to figure out what words are embedded in it if you don't capitalize things well in your advertising:

Site: GotAHoe.com
Is really: GoTahoe.com (Lake Tahoe Visitors Bureau)

Site: PenisLand.net
Is really: PenIsland.net (sells custom pens)


Site: TheRapistFinder.com
Is really: TherapistFinder.com (directory of therapists)

Site: ExpertSexChange.net
Is really: ExpertsExchange.net (data base experts site)

Site: *****Presents.com
Is really: *****presents.com (directory of agents and who they represent)

Site: PowerGenitalia.com
Is really: PowergenItalia.com (Italian power company)

Site: MolestationNursery.com
Is really: MoleStationNursery.com (a plant nursery in Mole Station, Australia)

Site: DollarSexChange.com
Is really: DollarsExchange.com (currency trading site)
and...

Site: CummingFirst.com
Is really: CummingFirst.com (yeah, well, it's the Cumming, Georgia, First Methodist Church!)